Q. Melissa: “How often, while having sex, are you actually envisioning ME rather than someone else?!” Eyes closed and averted doesn’t bode well for the answer I want! Sometimes I’m convinced he’s thinking Angelina so I start making faces at him...not like he’ll ever know, he’s too busy in the Land of Jolie.”

A. Melissa, your man still finds you attractive. If he didn’t, every time you asked for sex he’d find something more important to do, like masturbate. That said, the last time every bit of him had sex with every bit of you was after about six months of dating. No offense. I say “no offense,” because that’s exactly what women do, take offense… to EVERYTHING. Just because your man is thinking of another woman during sex doesn’t mean he’s actually having sex with her. If he were he’d actually be having sex with her. Your guy fantasizing about the new receptionist at work while doing you in your marital bed (or on the couch, under the kitchen table, and sometimes on the washer during the spin cycle) is normal. When Brad Pitt was married to Jennifer Aniston – Men’s Health Magazine’s sexiest Woman OF ALL TIME – do you think he fantasized about someone else during sex? Hell, yes. He pictured Angelina Jolie in “Lara Croft: Tomb Raider.” Who do you think he’s fantasizing about while having sex with Angelina? Megan Fox? Vivica A. Fox? Jamie Foxx? The Fox from “The Fox and the Hound”? An actual red fox? Who the fuck knows? And, frankly, who the fuck cares? Stop being selfish. Sex with your guy isn’t just about you; it’s about Catholic high school girls eating Twizzlers. So, if you want him to keep his eyes open during sex, dress and act like some tramp who doesn’t look, dress or act like you at all. It will be good for your marriage.